EQ

I asked a friend who has crossed 70 & is heading towards 80 what sort of changes he is feeling in himself? He sent me the following:

I love this TEDx talk from Dr. Alia Crum, partly because it’s further evidence that Carol Dweck’s popularization of the concept of “Mindset” matters. And, partly because one of the research projects Dr. Crum introduces is focused on hotel housekeepers.

Such a hard question to answer. I’d much prefer to answer the question, “Are You Growing Up?” The answer is yes as it suggests the process continues whereas “Grown Up” suggests past tense. As I’ve written in past posts, growing and aging aren’t mutually exclusive.

This is a question I’ve heard dozens of times in the past three years at MEA. People arrive at our beachfront campus on a dirt street with no name. They’re in a foreign country, and they’re a little cautious, like turtles whose heads recoil in their shell at the first sign of danger.

My friend Arthur Brooks, who is working on a book on the curse of success based upon many of the principles we talk about at MEA (challenge of letting go of one’s identity, being defined by ego), has a podcast called The Art of Happiness based upon his exceptionally popular Harvard University class.

Thanks to those of you who’ve made the trek down to Baja to spend a few spacious weeks with us for Sabbatical Sessions. Fernando Vazquez made the trip from Mexico City and brought me a few books (much appreciated by this bookaholic who still hasn’t figured out how Amazon can deliver to our dusty street with no name) including this New York Times bestseller.

An adolescent with a pacifier. A young adult clinging to the nest. A mid-lifer with bulging lips and an unbudgeable, Botox-infused forehead. None of these are natural. But such is the way of life when you’re trapped in the ugly clenches of the ego.

I probably don’t need to tell you that this is a strange Thanksgiving. Far fewer of us are seeing family and friends today. Some of us will raise our glasses and share out thanks on Zoom or by phone. I thought it was a good time for a little emotional math.

You’ve probably read this or heard it from some sage on stage. It’s often a motivational speaker trying to convince you that you’ll be happier, better looking or more successful if you junk the losers in your life. Yes, there’s some research that supports this premise, but I’d like to expand this thinking beyond the surface-level point of happiness, beauty, and wealth. Let’s reframe the question:

Hygiene has been a high priority during the pandemic. Many of us have become rightfully obsessed with washing our hands and shielding our mouths, noses, and eyes. And, yet, there’s growing evidence that one of the biggest risks of our COVID era is not just our physical hygiene, but our “psycho-hygiene.”