EQ

The title of today’s post comes from a great new book by Steven Petrow with Roseann Foley Henry. I’ve recently become friends with Steven and look forward to having this wise man be part of our MEA community. It encouraged me to make my top ten list of the things I will no longer do as I add a few years to my life.

I'll admit it. I've been a self-improvement junkie much of my life. In high school and college, I would sit for hours in the library reading books like "How to Win Friends and Influence People," "Think and Grow Rich," and, heaven forbid, "Atlas Shrugged."

One of the signs of wisdom is the ability to straddle contradictory beliefs and understand the logic of both. Being able to "split the ambivalence" is what relationships are all about. "Not knowing" is a form of wisdom.

Is there any more American mantra than this (spoken or unspoken)? I know this “worn-out axiom” has been central to my self-concept for most of my adult life. Someone asks me how I’m doing, and I immediately talk about how my company is fairing— Joie de Vivre, Airbnb, MEA

The deepening. Trust begat over time is one of my unexpected pleasures of aging. As we travel away from any starting point, the widening perspective allows us to view factors once invisible.

Our societal and personal narratives on our aging are at odds. Are we bored or content, selfish or stewards, irrelevant or essential?

The overarching thing I realized in midlife is that it’s one thing to have a life well-saved for, and a whole other level to have a life well-lived.

Many of us struggle with confidence. It’s fascinating to learn that some seemingly small and innocuous words can sabotage our self-esteem and dilute our message. By intentionally choosing our language, we can boost our confidence, and also positively influence the way we come across to others.

The question I get most as a spiritual-financial coach is "What is enough?" And as with any other essential question, it sparks deepening thought and personal reflection.

I loved this Washington Post story by Matt Fuchs that outlines the research showing that singing, dancing, improv comedy, writing, and painting all help create more openness in older adults, leading to greater longevity. Of course, creativity is not just limited to the arts. Problem-solving, landscaping, traveling, and advising a friend also can make the same difference.